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How To Make Yourself Happy?
I’ve spent a good portion of my life doing other people’s jobs. It was a fear I developed at an early age that was ingrained in me very deeply.
When I was young, I was taught to always respect people who are older than me, that means parents, grandparents, teachers, older siblings, uncles and aunts. I was under the impression that they knew more than I did, they knew what was best and what they wanted me to do would always be good for everyone.
Growing up I followed all the rules and could be counted on to do the right thing. Deep down, however, I am not satisfied with my behavior, I see myself trapped in other people’s dreams and plans.
Life as an “obedient child” included qualities such as:
- Accepting the mistakes of others to avoid conflict.
- Be diplomatic and sensitive to the feelings of others so as not to offend or hurt anyone.
- Doing things for others to the point that I overwork myself
- Giving in to the will of others, even when they oppose my own.
I learned in my early years that being the “obedient child” was a great way to gain recognition and avoid any conflict.
However, what I didn’t realize at the time was that I had become a prisoner in order to live a truly free and happy life.
What happens when someone who consistently suppresses their own feelings in favor of submitting to the feelings of others?
Over time, this person will bear the weight of commitments, decisions, and responsibilities that are not their own. Instead of living their dreams, they are busy living other people’s dreams.
So I lived a very long time. I lived my life for others instead of choosing what my heart really wanted to do.
When I said ‘Yes’, deep down I wanted to say ‘No’. It’s not that I didn’t have the ability to say ‘No’, I was afraid of “hurting” someone by asserting my will.
As I got older, I realized that living this way causes a person to lose focus on what they should be doing in their life and fills their time with things they shouldn’t be doing. There may be a million goals worth achieving for others, but not many worth investing a portion of my short life in achieving. Coming to this realization is very liberating. It replaces the feeling of burden with a feeling of freedom. It gives me the will to act and control over the direction of my own life.
If you are always seeking the approval of others and living according to their agenda as I described, today is the day to break that habit. You have the power to choose your life to live boldly and be true to yourself.
Your choices don’t require anyone’s approval and you don’t need to explain all your steps if you know what you’re doing is honest and true.
Maybe there are things you are holding on to in your life or relationship that are no longer worthy of your time and effort. They probably never intended to be valuable.
It’s just not a good use of your time to stay. Think big, be bold. Release what is not yours. Never be afraid to move on.
Give yourself a chance to do it. Give yourself permission to let go of the weight you carry, claim the freedom and happiness you so deserve.
Because it is important to know that YOU ARE SPECIAL and only when you feel free will you be happy. The key to happiness is actually living your authentic self!
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