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Managing and Working With Negative People

We’ve all been there. You find yourself working on an important project and one of your team members, co-workers or even your manager is a perpetual pessimist. I like to call such people, Ijačka. Do you remember Eeyore, the gloomy donkey from Winnie the Pooh. Words and phrases you often hear from pessimists are: “it won’t work”, “I can’t”, “why?” Not only can these people demotivate others, they can quickly derail a great project.

So what are you doing to help the I’s in your life? Ignoring them is not the right answer, although many of us seem to choose this as the only solution, believing that they cannot be helped.

First, you have to remember that they didn’t become pessimistic last week. Unfortunately, they probably came out of the womb looking at the world in a negative light. So any change that occurs will be small and slow. It is important to pay attention to the smallest positive change and when you notice a positive change, praise them for it!

When I work with leaders who focus more on the negative than the positive, the challenge is to get them to open their eyes to more possibilities than they initially see. In fact, they often see no options. I will try to challenge their beliefs that led them to a negative conclusion. For example, if I hear “I can’t” from someone, my next questions are, “Why do you believe that? What proof do you have? How solid and reliable is your evidence?” The idea is to get them to start seeing things in a more balanced and realistic way.

Another part of the process of managing a pessimist is to get them to see how they are affecting others around them. Good first questions to ask when someone says “I can’t” are, “If you can’t do it, how do you think it will affect others on your team? What resources or help do you need to ‘get by’? “

Change won’t happen overnight, but if you take action and don’t ignore the pessimist, you’ll start to see some positive results.

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