Why Does My 5 Year Old Still Poop His Pants Flight to Panama City, Panama: Baby Boom Real Estate

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Flight to Panama City, Panama: Baby Boom Real Estate

“You have a good head on your shoulders,” Moose told me.

It was the second time I’d heard that word in about a week and I was pumped

to imagine exactly what someone who didn’t have would look like

a good head on your shoulders. The pom pom doll was as far as I got when Carl

interrupted again:

“Excuse me, but can you get out of my way? If not, I will.”

I’m peeing my pants.”

I bought a ticket at extremely short notice and

he was subsequently penalized with possibly the worst seat on the entire plane.

18B. When I arrived and sat down next to the little boy in the window seat,

I thought that would be the extent of my punishment – annoying child. “Hello” he

he said with this loud cry before I could even sit up, “I am

Carl.” Carl was short, about the size of a young bobcat, and he had a shrill voice

an annoying personality that I’m sure his mother and teachers have labeled him as

curious
.

I was sitting there looking around when Carl tugged on my ear

about a number of things; from the new sneakers he got for his birthday,

to his wobbly front tooth that I thought was about to come out

our time together. Carl was in the middle of demonstrating his closeness

the reality of the next few hours set in. A large walrus appeared

our row, the shadow of his frame darkening about halfway up the cabin. The man looked

in his place, then he looked at Carl and me as if we were somehow a part

problem. “Why are you so fat?” Carl blurted out.

Children have my greatest respect when it comes to being

blunt and carl impressed me with that one question. “Well” fat man

he said, “I guess I eat a lot.” You can say it againI thought to myself.

“Jesus, I could fit four in your belly!” Carl was

he really spoke from his heart and I couldn’t help but smile in agreement. The

the man sat down and wedged himself between the armrests, stuck like a ham

stuffed sausage. In an effort to make him more comfortable, I stabbed a

a little closer to Carl giving Moose (as we would find out) something extra

space.

Moose was a Florida native heading to Panama for what he had

called “real estate enterprise”. He was wearing one of those futuristic headphones

connected to his cell phone, allowing him to use his hands for other activities

things like eating On his feet were some of the biggest therapy shoes I’ve ever had

ever seen, almost the size of soccer balls. When he asked why I was going

Panama, I told him I was a professional shark breeder and I was Moose

(like most people) I have never met a professional shark breeder before

explain to him just what i did. Carl was really interested in me

profession, asking industry-specific questions like: “do sharks fart?” hurry up

shark poop?”

Moos was fifty-nine. He and his 77 million co-baby boomers

are a group that is focused on current Panamanian real estate moves. He is

part of a psychographic who is simply ready to retire, move somewhere new and

start again. In addition to the strong population years, it is from the late twenties to the early years

Demographics of the 1940s: Panama must prepare for the eventual Generation Xers—a

a generation characterized by great challenges, international problems and whatever

but a typical corporate ranking. People like Moose are tired and frustrated

chronic workaholism and ready for something new. When I heard him use it

phrases like “start living again” and “take a risk for once”, I knew good things

will be waiting for him in Panama.

“I don’t have much (money),” Moose said, “but I do

really excited to see where i am do have takes me what is life

without a little risk?”

The flight to Panama City was characteristically deafening

chatter and zero breathing space. But there was a symbolic point of view in Moose

established and I was lucky for that. Not everyone can just up and leave

a tropical paradise, but for some it’s not as far as they think. When

the plane finally landed and everyone turned on their cell phones

a chorus of bells and jingles. One woman when she heard the news delivered

her phone burst into a scream mid-flight that eventually dissolved into tears.

“What is wrong?” Carl asked her. “The alligator ate my dog!”

she howled. “The alligator ate the teapot!” Everyone on the plane gasped and that was it

true: sometime during our flight a hungry alligator crawled out of the lake

near her home and ate her beloved nine-year-old llhasa apso. Tragedy

happened completely out of the blue.

I imagined the Teapot planning what to do

evening or perhaps thinking about what to have for an afternoon snack. What

Little did the teapot know that life, a 5 foot alligator to be exact, had it

further plans with her. I imagined the Teapot and the fear it must have gone through

eyes just before the last kill, maybe she wished she’d eaten something extra

the cookie that morning or that extra smell in the park. Because after

all that is life if not he lived a little.

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